Scared

Lots of women in second (& subsequent) pregnancies tend to forget how far along they are as they are busy dealing with exisiting children and the demands of everyday life. I am not one of them. I know exactly how far I am (14w 2d today, thank you very much.) and how much further I have to go.

I am rapidly approaching the dreaded 15 week mark - the point where we lost our last baby and I'm scared. I have been terribly anxious about this date and for a while there thought all was going so well. That we might just actually make it. That was until dead on 14 weeks, I started having a nasty heavy (and if I want to be completely honest) possibly achey feeling low down in my pelvis. Thankfully though, I've not had any other signs of impending miscarriage - no bleeding, no contractions, no discharge.

I am booked for a cervical stitch tomorrow. I just pray I can hang on long enough to see that through or at very least be well and truly under a general anaesthetic before it all goes pearshaped. I couldn't bear to relive the nightmare of a 2nd trimester miscarriage again.